September 24, 2011 § Leave a comment
here’s where it stands … i know Everything and Nothing … it’s the Middlething i am not at Home in [at the moment]
some things i know for sure:
* it’s lonely here [but how can you feel so alone with all these gorgeous people surrounding you? right. check it … refer back to the Middlething]
* it’s so humid that none of the floors or stairs squeak.
* there is a harvest fest down the street on the village green and this means … zeppoles … but at this moment i feel sick and am not sure i can eat any …
* i don’t feel well. this could be my emotional state, the humidity, or gracee’s tummy bug … i could be all three. in any case, as far as i know i am staying in bed.
* i feel so incredibly sad. as if someone/thing died. i have no idea what i am grieving, but the pain/numb [both at once? yeah. go figure.] is what it is regardless.
so yeah … that’s about it. and now … well … numb now. so i think i just want silence and then see what develops in there.
[ps. my eyes just fell on a book that is next to my bed of haiku by Basho named ‘Narrow Road to the Interior’ [i just let it sink in for a few moments. just staring at the binding.] and it is well named … no one can walk this with me. no one. … but since there is only This road … i know i can find my way back … unless there IS no back … and then, well. shit … i don’t know ‘then’ … so. just have to wait and see … at the moment i am walking. drawn actually. it’s the only path i have. it was either walk or stay and for some reason walking is the best answer. … and that’s about it… ]