something new and blue
February 6, 2012 § 8 Comments
It’s time I came out, as it were. And time for things to change.
On November 22nd, 2011, I signed myself onto a locked psych ward . I wanted to kill myself. But more than than that, I was thinking that burning my house down with me and my family inside would solve all my problems … and this scared me. Killing myself felt like a blessing, but my house. My family! No matter how that voice pushed at me, I knew is was wrong and I was in trouble.
With the help of a life long friend, we drove to the hospital and a crisis counselor and psychiatrist screening later, I was signing the papers that would commit me to a locked psychiatric ward … but more than that … a safe place where I could begin to heal.
This was one of the most humbling experiences of my life. And starting with the crisis couselor, to the psychiatrist and then the nurses on the ward I encountered … they all reiterated that it was my turn [as a healer] to be healed and to allow it.
Allow I did. … and still do.
Starting here and now, I will recount and chronicle what happened, how it started and how it continues and how I have healed and am healing still.
I am open to comments, questions and listening to your own stories. I have nothing to hide and the discussion and witnessing starts here.